Monday, November 07, 2011

The Borowitz Report : Wedding news

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Borowitz Report
November 7, 2011

In Money-making Scheme, Greece to Wed Kim Kardashian for 72 Days

EU Nations Serve as Bridesmaids

ATHENS (The Borowitz Report) – The Greek debt crisis that has roiled world markets for weeks was resolved today when Greece agreed to marry TV reality star Kim Kardashian for 72 days.

The marriage, believed to be the first ever between a sovereign nation and a television personality, is expected to net billions of dollars for Greece's debt-strapped economy.

The wedding between Ms. Kardashian and Greece will generate cash via a People magazine pictorial, an E! Entertainment reality series, and a bond offering backed by the International Monetary Fund.

Ms. Kardashian, attired in a Vera Wang wedding gown with a full tulle skirt, Basque waist and Chantilly lace appliqué, wed Greece in a formal ceremony that included all the EU nations as bridesmaids.

But even as the nuptials concluded, there were rumors that there was already "trouble in paradise," a friend of Ms. Kardashian said.

"Kim was annoyed that Greece didn't pay for the rehearsal dinner and left her with the bill," she said.  "Europe's used to that kind of thing, but Kim was pissed."

The friend said that she had her "fingers crossed" that the marriage between Ms. Kardashian and Greece would last 72 days.

"I don't want to spread rumors about Kim," she said, "but I've heard she's seeing Italy."  

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