Monty Python for Millennials
CUSTOMER: This content is dead.
SHOPKEEPER: No it's not, it's resting.
CUSTOMER: Resting? Now look here, I clicked on this content not two minutes ago and was assured by your headline that I would receive, and I quote, "6 Reasons Why Topanga from Boy Meets Word Will Always Be Your Biggest TV Crush."
SHOPKEEPER: Lovely headline.
CUSTOMER: Lovely it may be. But having secured my click, your article, far from delivering any thoughtful or humorous insights into Ms. Topanga's unique appeal, simply put forth a few lines of predictable drivel about how attractive the actress is. I won't stand for this claptrap!
SHOPKEEPER: Well she is pretty.
CUSTOMER: Of course she's pretty—any 19-year-old blogger could tell me that! The observation that she's good-looking does not itself constitute "content." This article has passed on! It has ceased to be! It's lifeless, intelligence-insulting, tenth-rate clickbait of the lowest order! This is ex-content!
SHOPKEEPER: I'll have to replace it then. How does "4 Cats in Sweaters" sound?