Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Fickle Colorado Laws

NY Times headline:

It's Now Legal to Catch a Raindrop in Colorado


But in South Park, Colorado,
it's still illegal for Jews to catch snowflakes on their tongue.

Wendy: "Try to catch snowflakes on your tongue. It's fun."
Cartman: "Hey! What the hell are you doing? Jewish people can't eat Christmas snow!"
Kyle: "We can, too!"
Stan: "Nnnnaw, I think it's against the law, dude."
Kyle: "Officer Barbrady! "
Barbrady: "What?"
Kyle: "Is it illegal for Jewish people to eat Christmas snow?"
Barbrady: [after a long pause] "Yyess."
Kyle: "Damnit!"

from Episode 110 - A South Park Christmas

Monday, June 29, 2009

"White Wedding" Literal Translation

What if those strange MTV videos from the 80's featured song lyrics that matched what you saw in the video?

see http://nevergetoutoftheboat.blogspot.com/2009/06/take-on-me-literal-translation.html

Dollar bills not included.


Recently, I was in a pet store and saw a collection of pet clothes.

Dress your dog like a ballerina, a rock star, even a leather-clad biker.

What's next?

Dress your dog like a stripper:  satin thong... and eight pasties.


how to use google to find mp3s

 Subject: how to use google to find mp3s



Advanced Google Search Codes

By abhinavbsbbec at Mon, 2006-05-22 01:25 | Internet

Advanced Google Search Codes

This How-To will teach you how to use google to find mp3s.
This How-To will be highly pragmatic and will focus on the hows and not the
wherefores of the various search strings.
0) Key
1) Directories
2) Xitami Servers
3) Directory Listing
4) Andromeda Servers
5) Zina Artists
6) Apache mp3 Servers
7) Individual Songs
Section 0 - KEY
You this are just some definitions I will use below.
[Directory String] can be any of the following :
1) "index of"
2) "last modified"
3) "parent of"
[file type] can be any of the following :
1) "mp3"
2) "shn"
3) "wma"
[mp3 name] can be any of the following :
1) the name of the album in quotes
2) the name of the artist in quotes
3) be daring and leave it blank and have lots of links
4) be creative!
1) -html -htm -php -asp -txt -pls
(inurl:) is optional and may be omitted and in fact most be
omitted if not using a search tool other than google.
(intitle:) can be used in place of (inurl:) and has a similar effect
again you must be useing google.
(-filetype:txt) adding this to the end of your search string can
filter some false positives.
(-playlist) adding this to the end of your search string can
filter some false positives.
Section 1 - Directories
These are the most common way that mp3s are stored on the www, you
should try these strings first.
String Format :
Type 1 : [Directory String] + (inurl:)[file type] + [mp3 name]
Type 2 : [Directory String] + (intitle:)[file type] + [mp3 name]
Type 3 : [Directory String] + [file type] + [mp3 name] + [limitors]
Example Strings :
- intitle:index.of + mp3 + "grandaddy" -html -htm -php -asp -txt -pls
- "index of" + "mp3" + "radiohead" -html -htm -php
- "index of" + mp3 + "grandaddy"
- "index of" + inurl:mp3 + "beatles" -txt -pls
- "index of" + intitle:mp3 + beatles
- "last modified" + "shn" + "dylan"
- "last modified" + inurl:shn + "bob dylan"
- "parent of" + inurl:wma + "grandaddy"
Suggestions :
- Try (intitle:index.of + "mp3" + "band name" -htm -html -php -asp) first it
is usually the most effective.
Another Little Trick:
- If you have been getting alot of results on google but the pages don't seem
to be there try adding dates and the "apache" string to your search i.e.
- intitle:index.of + mp3 + "grandaddy" -html -htm -php -asp apache feb-2005
- intitle:index.of + mp3 + "grandaddy" -html -htm -php -asp apache 2005
or if you just want a big list of mp3' doing a search like this everymonth
- intitle:index.of + mp3 + -html -htm -php -asp apache mar
Section 2 - Xitami Servers
String Format :
Type 1 : "xitami web server" + (inurl:)[file type] + [mp3 name]
Type 2 : "xitami web server" + (intitle:)[file type] + [mp3 name]
Example Strings :
- "xitami web server" + "mp3" + "radiohead"
- "xitami web server" + intitle:shn + "beatles"
- "xitami web server" + inurl:mp3 + "magnetic fields"
Section 3 - Directory Listing
String Format :
Type 1 : "directory listings" + (inurl:)[file type] + [mp3 name]
Type 2 : "directory listings" + (intitle:)[file type] + [mp3 name]
Type 3 : "directory listings of" + (inurl:)[file type] + [mp3 name]
Type 4 : "directory listings of" + (intitle:)[file type] + [mp3 name]
Example Strings
- "directory listings" + "mp3" + "radiohead"
- "directory listings" + intitle:shn + "beatles"
- "directory listings" + inurl:mp3 + "magnetic fields"
- "directory listings of" + "mp3" + "radiohead"
- "directory listings of" + intitle:shn + "beatles"
- "directory listings of" + inurl:mp3 + "magnetic fields"
Section 4 - Andromeda Servers
String Format :
Type 1 : "scott matthews" + andromeda + [mp3 name]
Type 2 : "scott matthews" + andromeda + [file type] + [mp3 name]
Type 3 : "powered by andromeda" + [mp3 name]
Type 4 : "powered by andromeda" + [file type] + [mp3 name]
Type 5 : inurl:andromeda.php + [mp3 name]
Type 6 : inurl:anromeda.php + [file type] + [mp3 name]
Type 7 : "scott matthews"
Type 8 : "powered by andromeda"
Type 9 : inurl:andromeda.php
Examples :
- "scott matthews" + andromeda + "radiohead"
- "scott matthews" + andromeda + "mp3" + "fitter"
- "powered by andromeda" + "gradaddy"
- "powered by andromeda" + "mp3" + "just like women"
- inurl:andromeda.php + "shn"
- inurl:anromeda.php + "wma" + "dylan"
- "scott matthews"
- "powered by andromeda"
- inurl:andromeda.php
Section 5 - Zina Artists
String Format :
Type 1 : "zina artists"
Examples :
- "zina artists"
Section 6 - Apache mp3 Servers
String Format :
Type 1 : "stream all" + apache + [mp3 name]
Type 2 : "stream all" + apache
Type 3 : "shuffle all" + apache + [mp3 name]
Type 4 : "shuffle all" + apache
Examples :
- "stream all" + apache
- "stream all" "shuffle all" mp3
- "stream all" + apache + radiohead
- "shuffle all" + beatles
Section 7 - Individual Songs
Format : [mp3 name].mp3 -playlist -filetype:txt
Examples :
- "ok_computer_live.mp3" -playlist -filetype:txt
- "*ok_computer*.mp3" -playlist -filetype:txt
- kid*a.mp3 -playlist -filetype:txt
2nd Method:
Here is a second example of maximizing search results on Google:
1. At Google Search, type in one of the following two phrases (try the first one; if you're not happy with the results, try the second one on your second search):
* "index of/mp3" -playlist -html -lyrics
* "index of/" mp3 -playlist -html -lyrics
2. If you'd like, add an artist's name or song name to the end of the phrase, then click the Search Button.
3. Here are a few examples:
* "index of/mp3" -playlist -html -lyrics beatles
* "index of/mp3" -playlist -html -lyrics punk
This tip helps you find directories filled with mp3 files by finding Apache's Index page:
1. At Google Search type in the following code:
2. +("index of") +("/mp3"|"/mp3s"|"/music") +(mp3|zip|rar) +apache
3. By editing this code, you can search for any type of media; oog, wav, pdf, etc.
4. Be sure to edit both the directory names as well as the file extensions if edited.
Finding mp3 and compressed files searching by title:
1. At Google Search type in the following code:
2. allinurl: +(mp3|rar|zip|tgz) TheTitle
3. Replace TheTitle with either a song title, artist name, or album.
4. Here are a few examples:
* allinurl: +(mp3|rar|zip|tgz) beatles
* allinurl: +(mp3|rar|zip|tgz) revolver
* allinurl: +(mp3|rar|zip|tgz) greatest hits

& to find cell phone programs:
just type the following line in your google search box and see experience a new world of finding games
for games
"parent directory" nokia games -xxx -html -htm -php -shtml -opendivx -md5 -md5sums
for tones
"parent directory " nokia polyphonic -xxx -html -htm -php -shtml -opendivx -md5 -md5sums
for symbian games
"parent directory " symbian games -xxx -html -htm -php -shtml -opendivx -md5 -md5sums
for Wallpapers
"parent directory " nokia wallpapers -xxx -html -htm -php -shtml -opendivx -md5 -md5sums
for general Midi
"parent directory " midi -xxx -html -htm -php -shtml -opendivx -md5 -md5sums
also try using "Index of" instead of "parent directory"
and other tips:
You've probably seen some sites that allow you to Google their site for a certain term. This is accomplished via the "site" advanced operator. The following syntax is used for the site operator:
For example, if we wanted to search www.coolindianguy.com
for the term "CoolIndianGuy", we would use the following:
CoolIndianGuy site:coolindianguy.com
The "inurl" advanced operator is used to search for a term within
URL's. For example, searching for "inurl:binaryuniverse" searched
for all sites that have the term "binaryuniverse" in their URL.
The "intitle" is used to search for a term in the title. Thus,
"intitle:binaryuniverse" finds all pages with "binaryuniverse"
in their title.
Google keeps caches of pages. When the Google spider indexes a page,
it stores a copy of it. Thus, the cache is a copy of what the page was
like at an earlier date. To view the cache for a page, you can simply
search for the page, and then click the "cache" link underneath.
However, there is a quicker way, that involves only typing in
search terms, and not clicking. Simply type "cache:pageurl.com"
to view the cache of a page (in this case pageurl.com).
Google also allows you to search for pages of a certain filetype,
using the syntax "filetype:TYPE". Replace 'TYPE' with the file type
you want to search for. So, if you wanted to search for tutorials
on SQL that are in PDF format, you would search for the following:
SQL Tutorial filetype:PDF
Not only is Google the world's best search engine, it also happens
to be a mighty fine dictionary. To use it as a dictionary, just type
"define:TERM", and replace TERM with the word you wish to look up.
For example, if you want to look up "roflmao", type "define:roflmao",
without the quotes. This will give you several different resources
for definitions or roflmao. Fyi, roflmao means "rolling on the floor laughing my **** off".
And now, it's time for some fun -- Google whacking. Actually, after
a couple minutes, I have found Google whacking to become extremely
boring, not to mention frustrating. A google whack is a two-word query
that returns one result. You may not use quotes, and both words in
the query must be real words. And yes, it is very hard.
For more info, I suggest you check out


At this point, the basics of Google have been covered, and you should
be a moderately good Googler.
how to search for STUFF at google
method 1
put this string in google search:
"parent directory " /appz/ -xxx -html -htm -php -shtml -opendivx -md5 -md5sums
"parent directory " DVDRip -xxx -html -htm -php -shtml -opendivx -md5 -md5sums
"parent directory "Xvid -xxx -html -htm -php -shtml -opendivx -md5 -md5sums
"parent directory " Gamez -xxx -html -htm -php -shtml -opendivx -md5 -md5sums
"parent directory " MP3 -xxx -html -htm -php -shtml -opendivx -md5 -md5sums
"parent directory " Name of Singer or album -xxx -html -htm -php -shtml -opendivx -md5 -md5sums
Notice that i am only changing the word after the parent directory, change it to what you want and you will get a lot of stuff.
method 2
put this string in google search:
?intitle:index.of? mp3
You only need add the name of the song/artist/singer.
Example: ?intitle:index.of? mp3 jackson
method 3
put this string in google search:
inurl:microsoft filetype:???
method 4
put this string in google search:
method 5
put this string in google search:
"name of object"download
"name of object download"
free "name of object"download
free "name of object download"
Or just look for the filename(s).
and instead of using the inurl: tag, use site: that works too.
For Rapidshare:


or movies:


or music:


Just play with the extensions.
inurl:ebook.DDU | inurl:ebook.EEN | inurl:ebook.JGT | inurl:ebook.LiB | inurl:ebook.EAT
There's a few ways to differentiate from that to change the outcome in your favor as well. For example, you can take away the "inurl:" to get many hits on things like forum posts or BitTorrent links. (Helpful if you're looking for something rare.)
You can also add the file type you like (such as PDF, CHM, LIT, etc) to get a specialized search. Finally, don't forget to put () or else Google may get confused. When defining a OR statement, Google expects the () to surround it. For example, you could search for:
- (ebook.DDU | ebook.EEN | ebook.JGT | ebook.LiB | ebook.EAT )
- PDF (ebook.DDU | ebook.EEN | ebook.JGT | ebook.LiB | ebook.EAT )
or get fancy with
- (PDF | CHM | LIT | ZIP | RAR | ISO) (ebook.DDU | ebook.EEN | ebook.JGT | ebook.LiB | ebook.EAT)
You can also use "Parent Directory"+ in front of it but don't limit the search to Google, try several engines.
A nice site for Rabbits & webbits:


added 6/6/05
Music Filetypes:
Movie Filetypes:
Picture Filetypes:
Compressed Filetypes (Used to search for programs):


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Sunday, June 28, 2009


"The human actors are in a witless sitcom part of the time, and lot of the rest of their time is spent running in slo-mo away from explosions, although--hello!--you can't outrun an explosion.   They also make speeches like this one by John Turturro: "Oh, no! The machine is buried in the pyramid!  If they turn it on, it will destroy the sun!  Not on my watch!"   The humans, including lots of U.S. troops, shoot at the Transformers a lot, although never in the history of science fiction has an alien been harmed by gunfire."


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Uranium For Sale - read the reviews

Uranium for sale on Amazon:

Example of some Customer Review titles:

  • Great night-light!
  • Perfect Fuel for Time Machines; Beware of Imitations / 1.21 Jiggawatts!
  • So glad I don't have to buy this from Libyans in parking lots at the mall anymore!
  • When your credit cannot afford the Death Star, take the Iranian Route
  • Good for the Megalomaniac on a budget.
  • My people can invade Earth now!
  • Aunt Kathy back with us again.

Friday, June 26, 2009

Good news: Abe Vigoda lives!

Good news: Abe Vigoda lives!

Bad news: Ed McMahon died this week.
The good news: Abe Vigoda is still alive!

McMahon, 86, was the longtime sidekick to Johnny Carson on the Tonight Show and as the host of Star Search launched the careers of many performers, including Britney Spears.

Vigoda was on the old sitcom, Barney Miller; he was in the classic movie, The Godfather; and he has appeared in numerous other films and television specials.

Unfortunately, his claim to fame has always been looking like he was on death's doorstep — not the best attribute for a public figure.

Since the publication of a People magazine article in 1982 which incorrectly stated he was dead, Vigoda has been actively assuring people he is in fact, still alive.

If you still doubt me, visit the Abe Vigoda status page at

As of Wednesday he was still alive and well, thank-you-very-much.

In fact, at 88, he still plays handball, lives on Manhattan's Upper East Side and was a recurring guest on Late Night with Conan O'Brien, including the finale.

Personally, I'd be a little miffed if people kept mistaking me for dead, unless it was the Internal Revenue Service.

My GraphJam contribution

 funny pictures


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Thursday, June 25, 2009

“index of” “parent directory” “last modified” BandNameHere .mp3 -faq

Subject: "index of" "parent directory" "last modified" radiohead .mp3 -faq

Ok, like i said i lost an update about Google because of a server move. Here it is again for those who are interested:
A lot of people store private files, movies, mp3's, pictures, etc on their server and don't make it public. Google does index these dirs though and makes them accessible through their search engine.
If you're looking for Radiohead for example, type this in google:
 "index of" "parent directory" "last modified" radiohead .mp3 -faq

Like this.
You will notice some links don't work but this one does and so do plenty of others.

After clicking a few links i end up here which not only has a Radiohead album ready to download but also 2 dozen other bands.
Looking for a specific song? Replace "radiohead .mp3″ with "songtitle .mp3″

Looking for chicks in bikini's instead? Type "index of" "parent directory" "last modified" bikini .jpg -faq
You can find tons of private pics this way. Pics you are not supposed to see hehe.
Ok, have fun with it!
look, i have a blog!
oh, stop yawning...



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Tasmanian Wallabies make crop circles in poppy fields



"The one interesting bit I found recently in one of my briefs on the poppy industry was that we have a problem with wallabies entering poppy fields, getting high as a kite and going around in circles," Ms Giddings told the committee.




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Tuesday, June 23, 2009

New interview with Spinal Tap



According to the site, this'll be up for another four days.


Respected "rockumentarian" Peter Curran joins the three iconic and influential band members of Spinal Tap in the studio for a playback of tracks from their new long-awaited album, Back from the Dead, 25 years after the release of the seminal "rockumentary" This is Spinal Tap.
Peter travels to Washington DC, Baltimore and a rehab facility in the Deep South to visit each of the band members David St Hubbins, Nigel Tufnel and Derek Smalls, to catch up with the individual members as they prepare to reform once again.
25 years ago This is Spinal Tap, exposed the shocking world of England's Loudest Band. The film showed us the monstrous egos and rampant stupidity of life on the road for a rock band at the mercy of fickle fate and fans. It spawned a phrase for all that is humiliating, incompetent and inept; a "Spinal Tap moment".
Who can forget the 18 inch Stonehenge debacle? Or when Nigel turned it up to 11 rather than just make ten louder? Or when the band spent an eternity lost in the basement, unable to find their way the stage and their enraged fans? These lycra- clad legends of the rock world brought us anthems like Big Bottom, Sex Farm and Jazz Odyssey.
Now they're back. A newly reformed Spinal Tap are touring, they have a new album out and they're playing Wembley. In the hour-long special, Peter Curran talks intimately to the band and plays tracks from their new album. He finds out what they've been doing for the last twenty-five years; the fights, the failed alternative careers, and the legacy of band-wrecking girlfriend Jeanine Pettibone.
He also hears both warm and jealous tributes from fellow practitioners; Jarvis Cocker on their lyrics, Glenn Tilbrook on Spinal Tap and Squeeze and Suggs on how he's stolen wholesale from the Spinal Tap back catalogue.
Embracing today's thirst for celebrity confessionals, these ravaged road warriors open their hearts and what's left of their minds for music lovers everywhere.

 notice that the volume slider goes up to eleven...

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Saturday, June 20, 2009

role reversal

 Below the Equator, it's not just the Seasons that are reversed:


News Item:

 Rugby match in New Zealand sees teams face off in birthday suits, briefly interrupted by streaker – with all his clothes on.




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Fight for your Rights

Bob Bendesky applauds the bravery of the Iranian people for holding protests, and refusing to become the "Silenced Majority."

look, i have a blog!
oh, stop yawning...



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Friday, June 19, 2009

Video is Forever


"Frodo Lives"
I bet Leonard Nimoy wishes this video didn't...


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Samsung Omnia Smartphone

You think the Apple iPhone rules as "Smartphone?"
It's about to be slain by the Samsung Omnia.
Even the simple act of taking it out of the box has more bells and whistles than Steve Jobs could ever dream of doing.
check it out at:  

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Thursday, June 18, 2009

PETA miffed at President Obama's fly "execution"

PETA miffed at President Obama's fly "execution"

Thu Jun 18, 2009 1:39pm EDT
POLITICO (Washington) - The president has been getting lots of kudos for a lightning-fast, Mr. Miyagi-worthy swipe he employed to slay a pesky house fly that was buzzing him in mid-interview during a taping with CNBC that aired Wednesday.
"He stopped the interview to track and kill the fly," said talk show host Conan O'Brien.
"That's some pretty impressive hand-eye coordination right there," Jimmy Fallon gushed. "Makes Obama look like a bad ass."
But now People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals, calling it an "execution," wants the commander-in-chief to show a little more compassion to even "the least sympathetic animals."
"Believe it or not, we've actually been contacted by multiple media outlets wanting to know PETA's official response to the executive insect execution," a blog on the group's website explained. "In a nutshell, our position is this: He isn't the Buddha, he's a human being, and human beings have a long way to go before they think before they act."
The group has sent Obama a device that traps a fly so it can then be released outside.
"We believe that people, where they can be compassionate, should be, for all animals," PETA spokesman Bruce Freidrich explained.
The fly saga began Tuesday, and it was the subject of a news report on Italian TV and almost a dozen Youtube postings that have been viewed more than 750,000 times.
 Thousands of people also have added commentary, including one who wrote, "But can he duck a shoe?" in reference to a hugely popular video of former president George Bush ducking a shoe thrown at him by an Iraqi cameraman during a news conference in Baghdad.
"Get out of here," Obama said as the fly buzzed him during his interview. The pest persisted, and when it landed on his left forearm, Obama smacked it.
"Now, where were we?" the president said without missing a beat. Pleased with himself, he added, "That was pretty impressive, wasn't it? I got the sucker."
Several observers in the room gave congratulatory shout-outs. Obama pointed to the floor and instructed an obliging cameraman to get a close-up of the corpse.
"It's like he's got one of those fly Terminator targeting systems in his eyes," said an awed Jon Stewart.
(c) Capitol News Company, LLC 2009



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clumsy clone tool

Ahmadinejad sucks at Photoshop



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Tuesday, June 16, 2009

Judge Dismisses Suit Claiming Cap’n Crunch ‘Crunchberries’ Aren’t Real Fruit

A California federal judge has dismissed a lawsuit filed by a San Diego woman who said she ate Cap'n Crunch cereal for years thinking "crunchberries" were real fruit.

Janine Sugawara sued General Mills, the maker of Cap'n Crunch, for fraud for claiming the colored balls of sugary cereal sprayed with strawberry juice concentrate were fruit. Sugawara only noticed the true nature of the cereal after eating it for four years, she claimed in her suit.


Judge Morrison England of the U.S. District Court for the Eastern District of California, however, dismissed Sugawara's suit on May 21 and ruled that she had failed to prove her legal case against the Cap'n.


"A reasonable consumer would not be deceived into believing that the product in the instant case contained a fruit that does not exist," the judge said in his ruling. "So far as this Court has been made aware, there is no such fruit growing in the wild or occurring naturally in any part of the world."


Imagine my disappointment to discover that Rice Chex don't contain any Czechs !


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RE: Mass Mail Muck-up


>> I have seen your article "" in the , ,



You may be wondering how I managed to get my article quote endquote  published in the esteemed journal comma comma.


My article was a detailed linguistic analysis of some very famous quotes, including the following:
  "  "  - Harpo Marx
  "  "  - Marcel Marceau
  "  "  - any giraffe

  "  "  - President Nixon's 'Silent Majority'

My article was submitted for Peer Review, and published without any editorial changes. The reviewers, of course, had no comment.

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Turn Almost Anything Into a Theremin


Imagine you could draw musical instruments on normal paper with any pencil (cheap circuit thumb-tacked on) and then play them with your finger.


 The Drawdio circuit-craft lets you MacGuyver your everyday objects into musical instruments





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Extreme Shepherding


  Extreme Shepherding

What do you get when you give a Shepherd a video camera, LED lights and a whole bunch of sheep? A sheeptastic experience as evidenced by the fun spot for Samsung directed by James Rouse with The Viral Factory.

After all, it seems only fitting that shepherds who gave us the great game of golf, be the first ones to usher sheep herding into the digital art age. Rouse and The Viral Factory enlist an enthusiastic group of herders known as the Baaa-Studs to make the magic happen over the hills of walls.   http://adsoftheworld.com/media/online/samsung_extreme_shepherding

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Monday, June 15, 2009

What happens when you cross Facebook with a Math Geek ?

What happens when you cross Facebook with a Math Geek ?
you get a vanity Facebook URL that goes like this:



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"Telling Rush Limbaugh he's full of crap"



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Mass Mail Muck-up

check out this spam message I received.
note the first sentence.
this is what happens when your mail merge program fails

From: Natalia Alexandrova [mailto:natal@ariadnegenomics.com]
Sent: Thursday, June 11, 2009 9:31 PM
To: Bendesky, Robert
Subject: Identifying potential disease or toxicity biomarkers using mechanistic models - webinar

Dear Dr. Bendesky,

I have seen your article "" in the , , and I thought
you would be interested in attending a 30 minute webinar "Drug-induced Cholestasis: A proposed framework for biomarker identification using mechanistic models".

If you don't want to receive our emails in the future, please click here.

Best regards,

Natalia Alexandrova
Tel: 240-453-6296 x111
Fax: 240-453-9026
email: natal@ariadnegenomics.com

9430 Key West Ave.
Rockville, MD 20850 USA

Marvel Comics, take notice.

" If workers cleaning up the nation's most contaminated nuclear site didn't have enough to worry about, now they've got to deal with radioactive wasp nests."
Peter Parker was bitten by a radioactive spider, and became the crimefighting superhero Spiderman.

When dozens of the cleanup men get stung, we'll have an army of crimefighters with wasp-like superpowers !

We'd better get busy as bees designing a costume for these guys...

Sunday, June 14, 2009

"Is there a Dylan in the House?"

 Hugh Laurie does a hilarious impression of a Bob Dylan song in this funny video from BBC comedy sketch show 'A Bit of Fry and Laurie'.



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Friday, June 12, 2009

Rowan Atkinson "invisible man" sketch

Rowan Atkinson "invisible man" sketch



I've always liked Rowan Atkinson, starting from his days in "Black Adder".
He's got a wonderfully flexible body.

This subway sketch is from a larger show, which begins with Rowan as Satan, taking roll call of the recent arrivals in Hell... "Are the French here?"


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Thursday, June 11, 2009

Own a piece of the Rock

from New Scientist:


WOULD you like to own this little piece of the moon?


Depending on which time zone you happen to be in, 20 or 21 July 2009 sees the 40th anniversary of the first moon landing.


Our competition to celebrate that historic event offers a rare and fabulous prize for the winner: a scrap of genuine moon rock.


The competition is simple to enter. You will doubtless know the words relayed from Neil Armstrong when he stepped off Apollo 11's lunar module and onto the moon itself: "One small step for man, one giant leap for mankind."


Can you think of something better for him to have said - something even more memorable, or perhaps something funnier?



How to enter

Your entry should be no more than 75 characters long (including spaces).

Use the comment form at the foot of this article to submit your answer.

Please start a new thread, rather than replying to an existing comment.

Please remember to include a working email address (in the correct box in the form, not in the comment itself) so we can reach you if you are our winner. It won't be used for any purpose other than the competition.

The winning entry will be chosen from entries received by 5pm GMT on 29 June.

It will be published in the 18 July issue of New Scientist, along with the best runners up.

The editor's decision is final.

Comedian Robert Kline said he admired Neal Armstrong's restraint.  He could have set himself up for life by climbing down the ladder, setting foot on the moon, and yelling "COCA-COLA !"


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Monday, June 08, 2009

Ah, Grasshopper redux

In memory of David Carradine, I picked up a blazing hot metal bowl using only my forearms.

Tomorrow, I'll use oven mitts.

in case you've forgotten...

Kung Fu Opening Narrative:
(Philip Ahn's voice as Master Kan:)

"Your tread must be light and sure, as though your path were upon rice paper. It is said, a Shaolin priest can walk through walls. Looked for... he can not be seen. Listened for... he can not be heard. Touched... can not be felt. This rice paper is the test. Fragile as the wings of the dragon fly, clinging as the cocoon of the silk worm. When you can walk its length and leave no trace. You will have learned."

Ah, Grasshopper!

In memory of David Carradine,
I walked across a sheet of rice paper.
I left footprints.
I have much to learn.

Organ donor dolls

These dolls are all heart - and lungs, eyeballs and brains.
David Foox, an artist based in Denver, Colorado, has created a collection of organ donor dolls


In The Year 3000

Conan O'Brien has brought back his segment of prognostication to his new Tonight Show, updating it to "In The Year 3000." Just reviewed the first one on Hulu. His last entry:

"In the Year 3000 -
YouTube, Twitter and Facebook will merge to create one big time wasting website called...


Saturday, June 06, 2009

Who needs a sleeping pill when you have THIS ?

It's TWO soporifics in ONE !!!

Friday, June 05, 2009

Archie, Betty and Veronica

Archie's getting married.

from mightygodking.com

Recently, the news that Archie will propose to Veronica has been sweeping the nation. Much like how Captain America died or Batman died. Now it is Archie Comics' turn to temporarily revive the fortunes of a flagging intellectual property through a shamless stunt.

Of course, this particular move, like so many others, has been met with criticism. Mostly because Archie is marrying Veronica. Most comics fans don't like Veronica, believing her to be a stuck-up mean bitch. And this is true. Veronica is a stuck-up mean bitch. But here are some truths about Veronica most people don't want to realize:

1.) She is rich. This counts for a lot.
2.) She is unpredictable and fun.
3.) She doesn't care much what other people think of her.
4.) She is rich, yo.
5.) Most importantly, she is not Betty Cooper.

Some people do not realize that this last is a major plus. Betty, after all, is the "nice" one. She makes Archie cookies and helps him with his homework and does charity-type things and doesn't gripe about being kind of poor. Plus, let's face it: she's smoking hot. Why wouldn't Archie want to marry Betty?

The answer is simple.
Betty Cooper is motherfucking psycho bugfuck crazy.

with scanned panels from the Archie Comics submitted as proof of Betty's stalker-like fixation on Archie


All that said, if I had to marry one of them, I'd take Betty

Veronica will treat you like shit, spend all your money, and fuck your brother.

As long as you don't divorce Betty, she'll treat you like a King.
...but if you DO divorce her, hide your pet rabbit and your large cooking pot...

Today is Dead Duck Day.

Today is Dead Duck Day.

Like last year, the short open-air ceremony is open to the public. Please come and commemorate the sudden and dramatic death of the mallard duck that entered the scientific literature as the first ever recorded victim of homosexual necrophila in this species, and discuss (new) ways to prevent birds from colliding with glass.

The necro-duck will be there and so is his keeper Dr Daniel Klem Jr , who has studied bird-glass collisions for more that 35 years, has send a special message (that will be read), and will read some appropriate passages from his book 'De eendenman' (The Duck Guy).

After it is all over, everybody is invited to the Tai Wu restaurant and join for the traditional six course duck dinner.

The ceremony starts at 17.55h sharp, the actual moment the duck lost his life in 1995.

Where? On the lawn next to the new glass pavilion of the Natural History Museum Rotterdam, Westzeedijk 345 (Museumpark), Rotterdam, the Netherlands.

(Click here for more detail, in Dutch)

Wednesday, June 03, 2009

The pause that refreshes take 2

David Sedaris wrote a short piece about another method of avoiding emergency bathroom runs:

David Sedaris:

With a pal like this, you don't need an enemy.

I've always liked the idea of accessories, those little pick-me-ups designed to invigorate what has come to feel drab and predictable. A woman might rejuvenate her outfit with a vintage Hermès scarf or a jaunty rope belt, but the options for men aren't nearly as interesting. I have no use for cuff links or suspenders, and while I'll occasionally pick up a new tie, it hardly leaves me feeling "kicky." Hidden accessories can do the trick, but, again, they're mainly the province of women. Garter belt and lingerie--yes. Sock garter and micro brief--no.

It was my search for something discreet, masculine, and practical that led me to the Stadium Pal, an external catheter currently being marketed to sports fans, truck drivers, and anyone else who's tired of searching for a bathroom. At first inspection, the device met all my criteria. Was it masculine? Yes, and proudly so. Knowing that no sensible female would ever voluntarily choose to pee in her pants, the manufacturers went ahead and designed the product exclusively for men. Unlike a regular catheter, which is inserted directly into the penis, the Stadium Pal connects by way of a self-adhesive condom, which is then attached to a flexible plastic tube. Urine flows through the tube and collects in the "Freedom Leg Bag," conveniently strapped to the user's calf.

The bag can be emptied and reused up to twelve times, making it both disgusting and cost-effective. Was it discreet? According to the brochure, unless you wore it with shorts, no one needed to know anything about it. Was it practical? At the time, yes. I don't drive or attend football games, but I did have a book tour coming up, and the possibilities were endless. Five glasses of iced tea followed by a long public reading? Thanks, Stadium Pal. The window seat on an overbooked cross-country flight? Don't mind if I do!

I ordered myself a Stadium Pal and soon realized that, while it might make sense in a hospital, it really wasn't very practical for day-to-day use. In an open-air sporting arena, a piping-hot thirty-four-ounce bag of urine might go unnoticed, but not so in a stuffy airplane or a small, crowded bookstore. An hour after christening it, I smelled like a nursing home. On top of that, I found that it was hard to pee and do other things at the same time. Reading out loud, discussing my dinner options with the flight attendant, checking into a fine hotel: Each activity required its own separate form of concentration, and while no one knew exactly what I was up to, it was pretty clear that something was going on. I think it was my face that gave me away. That and my oddly swollen calf.

What ultimately did me in was the self-adhesive condom. Putting it on was no problem, but its removal qualified as what, in certain cultures, is known as a bris. Wear it once and you'll need a solid month in order to fully recover. It will likely be a month in which you'll weigh the relative freedom of peeing in your pants against the unsightly discomfort of a scab-covered penis, ultimately realizing that, in terms of a convenient accessory, you're better off with a new watchband.